How to teach your child to share with others?


Sharing is one of the important social skills which makes it easy for your child to become friends and get along with its peers when going to school. However, not very child were born to share what they have with others. The parents therefore should teach the child when it is still very young.

1.Help The Child Understand That Sharing Is A Joy

You should praise and encourage your child when it agrees to play together with or lends its things to its peers, for example:

-“You are so good, my child!”

-“I am very glad that you have lent your things to your peers!”

-“Your are right, playing with peers will be much more joyful!”.

 Teach your child to play community-oriented games in which players must work together such as jigsaw puzzle, solving jigsaw puzzle, holding each other’s hands to make a circle…Create opportunities for the child to share foods with others, or take photos of the moment the child plays with them and then ask to remind it of that event.

When at home, let your child take part in simple works to assist its grandparents, parents in planting trees; cleaning tables, chairs; putting clothes into the wardrobe after the mother has arranged…

2.Don’t Hasten To Punish Or Scold When The Child Appears To Be Selfish

 If you beat or scold your child as a “selfish one” while it doesn’t know what sharing or selfishness mean, or you force your child to hand its things to others, then your are wrong. By doing in this way, your child will hates the other child even more, and nostentatiously, we have created in the child resentment rather than sharing. Let’s teach the child gradually to understand in a natural manner, everything needs time, so does teaching children.

You should explain to the child that the other will return and will not damage the child’s things. Children are always afraid that their things would be lost, that’s why they do not want to lend to others.

3.Explain To The Child What Rotation Means

This will be very necessary for the child, whether at school or at home. For example, when at school, the child should be shown how to stand in line or receive gifts from teachers. Your child will take gifts only when it’s its turn, rather than jostling or snatching things from others.

And when at home, you can train your child to stack cubes one on another, you stack one and then it’s the child’s turn and so on. Or you can express your fondness by kissing your child and then ask it to do the same in return.

4.Explain To The Child The Feeling Of Being Refused

The parents should explain to the child to understand when its peers refuse to play with. For example, you can ask:

-“Your friend did not want to lend you his car, are your sad about that?”

-“Yes, mum”

-“Then, if in exchange, you don’t lend your car to your friend, will he be sad?”

-“Yes, mum”

-“If you lend your toys to your friend to play, then other times he’ll lend you his toys.”

 Thereupon, when the child understands the feeling of being refused, it will be more sympathetic towards its peers, will be more likely to play with its peers friendly and in communion.

5.Respect The Child’s Things

Some children, when noticing their peers take their things, books or wear their clothes, they’ll discard these things though these have just been in use. That’s why you should ask your child before lending whatever things of the child, even though it might merely be a pencil, and give your child the power to decide whether to lend or not.

At the same time, you should also teach your child to ask for permission when wishing to borrow things. Only when you agree can your child take the things to play, rather than doing this arbitrarily, and after each borrowing, it must say ‘thank you’. You should further ensure that the child’s siblings or family members should also respect the child’s things, by asking them to keep them with care when borrowing.

6.Encourage The Child To Exchange Its Things With Its Peers

In exchanging things, the child will have more things, with more joys to play and the next time it will spontaneously exchange things with its peers, without fearing the lack of things to play. Make sure with your child that to play with its peers does not mean to gift the toys to them, and if your child lets at its peers play its toys together, then the peers will also share and play their things with your child. You can also encourage your child to show its peers how to play its things; they’ll like this very much.

7.Encourage The Child To Care For Its Peers

When your child is back from school, you may enquire about its classworks, train the child to care for its peers by saying, for example, “When seeing a friend of yours cry, you must not laugh but ask why he is crying and tell him not to be so sad, and if you have toys, call him to play together”.

8.Praise The Child When It Knows How To Share With Others

In addition to embracing or praising your child, when at meal, you may commend your child’s good deed in the presence of others, or go out with your child and choose something for the child when eating out. The child will understand that what it has done is right and this pleases adults, from that the child will do more.

9.Adults Should Set An Example For The Child 

No lessons are better than the ones from the examples set by the parents and the surrounding people, these are the lessons as observed by the very child. When cooking a dish, you should call your child to carry and gift it to someone, or with the toys your child wants to play with no more, you tell your child to gift them to its peers.

Just show your child how to share even when this is a smallest thing: an ice cream, a colour pencil, or a sheet of paper…Use the word of sharing to express the things you are doing. Let your child witness how its parents share and love others so as to shape consciousness in your child right from the time it is still very young.

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